Well-Rounded Mediocrity

Next year my son starts middle school. We just received a brochure explaining all the electives offered at his new school. Foreign language, band, orchestra . . .he can even take model rocketry.

At the bottom of the page I noticed a little disclaimer that just might erase my son’s dreams of mastering the viola. It seems that kids who fail to test at grade level on the reading portion of the WASL (Washington’s Assessment Tool) must take a reading enrichment course as their elective. Apparently, only scholars are allowed to be artists.

For years, parents urged the schools to get back to the fundamentals of reading, writing, and arithmetic. I’m sure the schools would argue they are responding to both the parents’ pleas and the No Child Left Behind mandate. I think what we have here is a failure to communicate.

Yes, I want my child to be a better reader. But why can’t he become a better reader in his language arts class (that he’ll take in addition to the reading enrichment class)? If we’re going to “enrich” slower readers, why not also corral the kids who don’t pass the math or writing sections? I guess you don’t need to know your times tables before you learn to count in Spanish.

In How Full Is Your Bucket?, by Tom Rath, he explains how the North Koreans broke their prisoners during the Korean War. Rath says, “the tactic of withholding all positive emotional support while inundating soldiers with negative emotions was perhaps bucket dipping [the term Rath uses for inflicting emotional/psychological injury] in its purest and most malicious form.” While this case is undoubtedly extreme, negativity in the workplace causes lost productivity, employee turnover, absences and increased unethical behaviors.

So back to the viola. Certainly, I want my child to learn the fundamentals. But I also want him to learn to love the arts, sports or whatever non-academic interest allows him to experience life to the fullest. How will he ever have the opportunity to flourish in other areas if he’s constantly held hostage by a federal standard meant to assess the effectiveness of schools?

What’s the point of this ramble? Why don’t we learn to celebrate people’s strengths rather than throwing all our energy into fixing their weaknesses? When we will instead start helping the weak and free them to make their own valuable contribution to the world we share?

Courage or Recklessness?

Do you recall a person in your life whose constant attitude was, “I’ve already made up my mind; don’t confuse me with the facts”? Most of us have made a few bad decisions for lack of information. But have you ever become so committed to a course of action that you intentionally closed your mind to information that might persuade you against it? Perhaps it was the time you chose not to check a car’s reliability ratings because you really wanted the car. Or perhaps it was the time you avoided asking a sensitive question during a job interview. Sometimes it’s easier to assume now and to complain later when you find out you were wrong rather that to face reality up front.

Courage is not recklessness. Courage does not spawn momentum by ignoring potential pitfalls or obstacles. Courage welcomes information, especially the kind that might impact the direction or timing of a decision. Yet courage does not get stuck in “the paralysis of analysis.” You can never know enough to eliminate every danger; only God knows the future. So choose to move forward in spite of well-understood risks. Courage embraces reality with all its hazards, “eyes wide open”.

~John

It’s not fair!

Today, I opened the Bible to Matthew 20 and read the Parable of the Vineyard Workers. Here’s the synopsis. A landowner hires a group of workers in the morning, a second group three hours later, and a third group two hours after that. At the end of the day, he pays the last group first, then the second group and finally the early birds. Every group is paid the same amount. The early birds cry foul, even though they were paid the wage they were promised.

What’s the lesson here? “The last will be first, and the first will be last.” Just in case these words were a little too cryptic, Jesus spelled it out for religious leaders in chapter 21, “the tax collectors and the prostitutes are entering into the kingdom of God ahead of you.”

On the surface level I get it. God’s reach extends beyond the inner circle of “good Jews.” Gentiles and backslidden Jews are offered a place at God’s table, as well. When I allow myself to mull over the story, however, I have to admit I’m a lot like the early birds who cry foul. I mean if the landowner wanted to be generous, fine. But couldn’t he have paid the late group last, after the early birds were paid and merrily on their way home? Why did he have to rub it in the faces of those who worked all day?

So here’s my confession. I have a hard time (okay, I have to fend off gale force storms of jealousy) with late bloomers – the ones who lived wild, self-indulgent lives. They retired at fifty, did a little life assessment and decided to follow Christ in the second half of their lives. Now they’re best selling authors, nationally known speakers and respected authorities on spiritual matters. As one who has known Christ since age 16, I often feel like the early birds. “It’s not fair!” Yes, I know my response is wrong. Yes, I know I should celebrate when lost sheep return home. Perhaps, that’s why my gut response disturbs me so much.

I think I know what the problem is. I’m not upset that God saved and uses the late bloomers. In fact, I really do rejoice with them. I’m upset that I didn’t get to sin as much. My issue is that I didn’t get to be greedy, selfish and materialistic (at least not guilt-free) and still considered “spiritually mature.” And that’s the ugly truth. That’s why “the tax collectors and the prostitutes are entering into the kingdom of God ahead of you.” They understood sin for what it was – evil. So I am the one who needs cleansing. Perhaps, it’s fair after all.

~Joyce

Selfish Jerk or Focused Contributor?

Our desire for approval can cripple us. If you care about people, you want to meet their needs. But life is busy. Sacrificial service disintegrates into good intentions. Out of sheer survival, you become calloused to the needs of others. You’re ashamed of your indifference but overwhelmed by the level of adversity around you. When you finally roll up your sleeves, you feel you can’t do enough. Frustrated, you wonder, “Will I ever make a difference?”

During an interview on the television program 20/20, host John Stossel grilled Texas billionaire Dan Duncan, regarding charitable contributions.

Stossel: “You’ve given a lot to charity, but really you gave only 2% of your net worth. That sounds cheap.”

Duncan: “If that was all that I ever wanted to give away, I would agree 100%, [but] if you're one of the gifted people that can actually make more money, people receiving it are better off if you keep it to get a lot more later on."

Duncan perceives his ability to make money as a gift that ultimately benefits others. His corporation, Enterprise Products, does generate a huge amount of wealth for Duncan to give away. Whether cancer research (Duncan’s charity) profits more from a lump sum or a steady stream of cash is a subject for debate, but Duncan clearly believes he is a greater asset to the world when he operates from his strengths.

Undoubtedly, we have the most impact when we embrace God’s design for our lives. But the short term thinkers always seem to have better plans for our time. They belittle our progress because they don’t understand our goals. How do you stay on course without ignoring the needs of others?

The Cost of Trivial Excellence

Once there was a man who set out to get rich so that he could afford all the things his heart desired. He hung pictures of expensive cars and boats, luxurious homes, exotic vacation resorts, and the latest entertainment technology on his wall. He believed that these pictures would motivate him to work hard for the things that he wanted. He devised strategies to meet persons of means and influence, to impress them, and to earn their trust. He believed that these people would provide him with opportunities to make money.

So the man worked very hard, met all the “right” people, and eventually became very rich. Then he discovered that the amount of work required to maintain the lifestyle he had built left him with little time to enjoy that things he had accumulated or the people he had so impressed. He found himself very lonely. He eased the pain of his loneliness by turning with even greater intensity toward the thing he had learned to be good at, making money. His life grew increasingly complex. More money required more work, added stress, and even greater isolation. He was left with no time to love or to be loved.

Is your life filled up with busyness in the pursuit of things that lacks eternal value? Do you keep doing something you’re good at just because you’re good at it? Do you avoid things that are more important because you’re not good at them? It takes great courage to evaluate the value of what you do. Purging your life of trivial busyness can be as challenging as overcoming an addiction.

What kinds of pictures do you hang on your walls? These are the same images that hang on the “walls” of your mind and heart. They are the things that drive you; they are the things that you love. It has been said that one kind of person loves people and uses things; another kind of person loves things and uses people. Do you find yourself being inauthentic with people in order to get what you want from them? If so, than which kind of person are you?

~John

Fear and Love

I just finished reading Lifesigns, by Henri Nouwen. Though written in the 1980’s, I found his message timely for 2008. He says we are driven by fear or love. The two cannot coexist. “Fearful questions never lead to love-filled answers,” Nouwen claims.

I often think of love as the opposing force to hatred or apathy, but seldom have I considered love the alternative to fear. Yet how often does sheer survival hinder my relationships? It seems innocent enough. “If I call her, she might need something and I really don’t have time right now.”

“You volunteer once or twice, and then it never ends.”

“If I praise him for pulling up his grades, he’ll think B’s are good enough.”

Fear – of a runaway schedule, unyielding demands, or underachievement – stops love in its tracks. Though I want to extend my arms, fear suppresses my desire.

I’m thankful the God of love is stronger than my fears. By his grace, he nudges me along, to choose compassion over isolation, generosity over selfishness, encouragement over criticism . . . love over fear. What fearful questions are you asking today? How is God challenging you to ask different questions?

~Joyce

The Quiet Voice of God

I plopped down at my desk. Staring back at me was the Bible I hadn’t cracked in several days. Next to it was yesterday’s “to do” list with less than half the tasks crossed off. Lingering in the background was a darkened computer screen loaded with fresh emails which, with the faintest touch of the mouse, would steal the spotlight from the gold-edged pages waiting for today’s verdict. What a poignant picture of my life right now, I thought.

“Read your Bible first,” the Spirit inside me whispered.

“But I have so much to do,” my flesh argued back. The knot in my stomach twisted and tightened as I pondered this week's demands. “If I can just get through my list, then I’ll have time to focus on my Bible reading and give God the attention he deserves,” I reasoned, knowing full well how that strategy had panned out yesterday.

The gentle whisper answered back, “In whom are you depending?”

Guilty. My reluctance to open God’s Word betrayed my distorted view of God and myself, for that matter. Today, I saw no power in Scripture, just a duty to read it. Through the years, I’ve learned to follow that sense of duty when it’s all I can muster.

I opened to 2 Samuel. “Drat, I lost the flow by skipping several days,” the excuses started to flow. “Was Abishai a priest or Joab’s brother? Now I have to look up all the names again.” In time, the frustration dissipated and God began to speak to me through his Word. In today’s passage, revenge’s stench was strong, but mercy’s beauty proved more powerful. My heart and mind were transported from the broken freezer and the Open House guest list to the company of my Creator, who knows my daily anxieties but wants to offer me more than a rescue. He wants to elevate my heart, soul and mind to a place where my daily worries are small when compared to the greatness of the Father who loves me.